June 23, 2003

MP:Life of Brian

Life of Brian
Recalling a favorite scene in Monty Python's Life of Brian.

The setting: Roman-controlled Judea, circa 30 A.D. The Roman Colosseum, Jerusalem. Children's Matinee.
The players: The People's Front of Judea (PFJ) are sitting in the arena stands, discussing the importance of diversity in their fight against the oppressors. Brian is working selling snacks to the crowd. (Dog's tongues. Wren's livers. Jaguar's earlobes.Wolf nipple chips. Dromedary prezels. Tuscany fried bats.)

Brian approaches the PFJ...

BrianAre you the Judean People's Front?
RegF--- off.
RegJudean People's Front. (scoffs) We're the People's Front of Judea. Judean People's front, caw.
Francis Wankers.
Brian Can I join your group?
Reg No. Piss off.
Brian I didn't want to sell this stuff. It's only a job. I hate the Romans as much as anybody.
PFJ[nervously] Sssh! Ssssh, sssh, sssh, ssssh.
Judith Are you sure?
Brian Oh. Dead sure... I hate the Romans already.
Reg Listen. If you really wanted to join the PFJ, you'd have to really hate the Romans.
Brian I do.
Reg Oh yeah? How much?
Brian A lot!
Reg Right. You're in. Listen. The only people we hate more than the Romans are the f---ing Judean People's Front
PFJ[together, nodding in agreement] Yeah
Judith [disgusted] Splitters
Francis And the Judean Popular Peoples Front.
PFJ Oh yeah. Splitters.
Loretta And the peoples Front of Judea.
PFJ Splitters.
Reg What?
Loretta The Peoples front of Judea. Splitters.
Reg We're the Peoples front of Judea.
Loretta Oh. I thought we were the Popular Front.
Reg Peoples Front! [scoffs]
Francis Whatever happened to the Popular Front, Reg?
Reg He's over there.
[A single old man sits on a lower seat.]
PFJ [To the old man.] SPLITTER!

Look here for this scene, with sound clips, and here for the entire script. A discussion on Mike's blog put this in my head.

None of it had anything to do with Glory Horns. But they're welcome just the same.

Posted by James at June 23, 2003 9:05 AM
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