February 24, 2004

Your Hangups Are Showing

This cracked me up. I followed a link on a conservative weblog to the following site which proposes a way to put an end to performances of Eve Ensler’s most famous work on Catholic college campuses. See An End To Ensler.

You get jock fraternities to put on the play, casting their “little sisters” as the performers. No changes necessary; keep the script intact. Schedule it maybe for Ground Hog’s Day, just to give faculty and admin hacks time after the Christmas break to read the posters and conjure up the mental picture of a roomful of Alpha Delts, all five or six tallboys to the good, wolf-whistling the actresses and hooting in sarcastic glee at the trash-talk.

Stupidity of the suggestion aside, here’s what cracked me up. The author keeps referring to The Vagina Monologues as “V Monologues.” What’s wrong? Did the microcephalic critic lose his dictionary, or can’t he bring himself to type the word “vagina?” Does he have similar problems with bringing himself to type other body-part-names like “rectum,” “penis,” or, perhaps “elbow?”

I can just picture a trip to the doctor for this fellow. “Doctor, my pee-pee hurts and last week after eating some bad shellfish my poopies were loose coming out of my bum-bum.”

It’s a vagina. Lots of people have them. It’s OK to say it.

I have no real opinion regarding The Vagina Monologues since I’ve never seen it. If it offends him, I wonder if he’s considered not going to see it. I suspect his real problem was that he attended a performance and was disappointed that it wasn’t like his usual experience with live female entertainment. Specifically, there was no poll on the stage and they didn’t let you close enough to stuff dollar bills.

Posted by James at February 24, 2004 6:49 PM
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