November 10, 2005

You and James Read the News

That wacky, wacky news.

No Swearing Needed for Oil CEOs

Not the profanity kind.

Big oil CEOs under fire in Congress

Even before the remarks got started, Democrats and Republicans debated whether the executives should have to swear to tell the truth before the panel.

Alaska Republican Stevens, head of the Senate Commerce Committee, rejected calls by some Democrats to have the executives sworn in, saying the law already required them to tell the truth.

Oh. OK. Right. Even though, according to Kos, even the baseball players testifying before congress were sworn in, during that whole steroids business. But, really, why bother?

Maybe congress felt sorry for them about the whole closing ANWAR thing.

Study finds more sex scenes on TV

Characters on TV are having sex more often -- in fact twice as often as they were in 1998 -- according to the Kaiser Family Foundation's biennial study Sex on TV 4, released on Tuesday.

What do you expect after putting all those Viagra, Cialis and Levitra commercials on TV?

Kansas to World: "I thought the jury was still out on science."

Kansas' criteria challenge evolution
In win for intelligent design advocates, school board rewrites science standards

In addition, the board rewrote the definition of science, so that it is no longer limited to the search for natural explanations of phenomena.

Let me clarify the insanity for you. Not only is Kansas going to teach ID, they're redefined science to include... well any darn thing you want. In Kansas schools, science is now simply any "systematic method for continuing investigation." So, if you're attending different churches to see which ones appeal to you the most... SURPRISE! You're doing Kansas Science™.

The less you know, the more stupider you get.

Health Experts Agree on Plan to Combat Flu Pandemic

The experts say they urgently need money to carry out their anti-flu pandemic programs. The United Nations is organizing a big fund-raising conference in mid-January in Beijing.

Unless you're planning to blow up the Asian flu virus, or torture it, I have a feeling you're going to have a hard time getting money from the US. Sorry, but trying to stop it by "disappearing" a bunch of chickens and turkeys is not sexy enough for TV. Next.

STD Alerts

St. Louis has worst gonorrhea rate in nation

Sorry to hear it, St. Louis. However, we in theSC (and Bay Staters in general) are not to be outdone.

Mass. issues alerts as STD cases multiply (a story from back during the summer)

A rare sexually transmitted disease has appeared twice in Massachusetts this year, at a time when chlamydia rates are rising and an increasing number of gonorrhea cases are drug resistant.

New trends in STD infections have prompted the Massachusetts Department of Public Health to issue three recent advisories: on gonorrhea, syphilis, and the rare lymphogranuloma venereum (LGV).

In actual good news, HIV rates are dropping in this state. Did I actually read that 1 out of 20 people in DC are HIV positive?

Trust US

Recently, our representatives told North Korea to shut down a nuclear reactor. And we stressed the building of trust:

"You know how you build up trust? You live up to the agreement," said Mr. Hill. "You come up with solid implementing schemes that enable you to move forward and show that what you've agreed to do in the agreement, you're actually doing and that's the best way to build up trust."

Why wouldn't they trust us, with our goodwill and diplomatic capital being at such an all-time high internationally?

Gee, I guess pissing the world off doesn't necessarily pay big, strong, influential dividends after all.

And this doesn't help, either:

VENEZUELA'S president has threatened to give Cuba and China F-16 fighter aircraft from his arsenal, insisting that the US has failed to fulfil its maintenance commitments for the combat planes. (via Scotsman com)

Lame-Ass Drama In Taunton

Teen charged with kidnapping former girlfriend in vehicle

An East Taunton teenager is charged with kidnapping after police say his ex-girlfriend had to jump from his moving car Tuesday to free herself from his jealous ranting.[...]

Machado's ex-girlfriend, a 19-year-old East Taunton woman, told police that Machado was driving aimlessly around East Taunton, shouting slurs at her because another man had called her on a cell phone.

Dude, check it out. You are lame AND in the newspaper.

And that's quite enough reading the news for now.

Posted by James at November 10, 2005 9:02 AM
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The news station I was watching this morning mentioned the survey about sex scenes on TV. I laughed when I noticed they were showing a clip of a sex scene in the background.

Posted by: Mike L. at November 10, 2005 10:10 AM

Would these Kansans by any chance be the same people who indignantly accuse certain other people of trying to rewrite the definition of marriage (aka "marridge")?

Taunton: I went to school with the investigating officer.

Posted by: Julie at November 10, 2005 11:00 AM

Julie is our resident Taunton 70's-mid 80's historical expert.

So close to my own home, Taunton has always been somewhat of a mystery to me. It's as though nothing north of Dighton stuck in my mind growing up.

Posted by: James at November 10, 2005 11:20 AM

At least the voters in Dover PA voted out pro-"intelligent design" members of their school board. Eight of the nine believed teachers should stand in front of the class and admit the world is so complex, it must have been made by God. (I wish I'd had that luxury in my biology class. "The Krebs cycle is so complex, I can't explain it because God made it.")

Posted by: ThirdMate at November 10, 2005 11:50 AM

The crux of superstition is this:

"The world is too complex for me to understand so MAGIC DID IT!"

vs. science:

"The world is too complex for me to understand all of it right now, but here's what we know and we also know that it is leading us here."

But, truth be told, I am still working at understanding the actual philosophy of science. Kansas has given up. By their definition as long as your search is "systematic" you're golden.

It is easily arguable that "Crossing Over with John Edward" is systematic. It's not science it's Kansas Science!

Posted by: James at November 10, 2005 11:59 AM

So, anyone attempting to explain anything is a systematic way has scientific credibility in Kansas? So, we can start a foundation for psychic science is Kansas and rake in the dollars, yes?

Posted by: briwei at November 10, 2005 12:57 PM

Here's a thought. Let's tell the government that we need to torture some Asian bird farmers. We think the disease might be manufactured. We need to black op a bunc of birds and farmers. They're terrists. That'll get it done. It'll be Abu Giblets.

Posted by: briwei at November 10, 2005 1:00 PM

K.I.S.S. - Kansas Is Simple, Stupid, etc.

Posted by: Mike L. at November 10, 2005 1:17 PM

As long as they allow Pastafarianism and the theory of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. That's the deal. If not, we just go back to vinegar and baking soda to explain volcanos. That should keep them simple in Kansas.

Posted by: ThirdMate at November 10, 2005 1:42 PM

Abu Gibblets!! I love it!!!

Posted by: Patti M. at November 10, 2005 3:22 PM

That's funny, I could have sworn it was BlackBean yesterday.

Will GreenBean be weighing in too?

Posted by: Julie at November 25, 2005 2:47 PM

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