November 27, 2006

Would You Rather?

Headlong into the holiday season we go. Here we are in the heady time between Thanksgiving and New Years Eve. I can’t help but toss you a themed “Would You Rather.”

Would You Rather?

  • Be one of Santa’s elves? (Work hard 365 days a year, but really happy about it. And sing a lot. Free hot chocolate. You’re very short.)
  • Be one of Santa’s reindeer? (Spend 364 days per year cooling your heels and playing reindeer games. Have to fly around the entire world in one 24 hour period. You can fly! Free reindeer chow, candy-cane flavored on the weekends. No opposable thumbs.)

Choose wisely!

Posted by James at November 27, 2006 10:12 AM
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Reindeer games sound more interesting than elf games. More Keebler than Legolas. The ability to fly trumps everything else for me.

Posted by: Mike at November 27, 2006 10:30 AM

I'd rather be a flying deer than a toiling minion.


"I’d rather be a sparrow than a snail.
Yes I would.
If I could,
I surely would.
I’d rather be a hammer than a nail.
Yes I would.
If I could,
I surely would."

Posted by: Patti M. at November 27, 2006 10:35 AM

Reindeer, definitely. Flying and 364 days of vacation, oh yeah. Although the singing bit did make me consider Elfdom for a minute.

Posted by: mjfrombuffalo at November 27, 2006 10:41 AM

Reindeer, no doubt about it. Flying, work 1 day a year? Is there any benfit to being a slave, er, elf?

Posted by: B.O.B. (bob) at November 27, 2006 10:46 AM

An elf, for sure. I would love to make toys all day. What good are reindeer games if you have no thumbs? What on earth fun is it to stand in a stall full of hay and your own droppings all day? Oh, yeah, and the diet is really delicious. Yummm, hay and grain.

Posted by: Maggie at November 27, 2006 10:48 AM

Oh, yeah, and the diet is really delicious. Yummm, hay and grain.

But when you're a deer, that is yummy!

Posted by: Patti M. at November 27, 2006 11:16 AM

Elf. I'd be happy leading a revolution against the big guy for better pay and more vacation! Unionize I say! ;)

Posted by: Hooligan at November 27, 2006 11:23 AM

I'll take soaring reindeer over elf slave. Done deal.

Posted by: Chuck S. at November 27, 2006 11:31 AM

They both sound pretty awful, but I think the reindeer get a better deal.

Posted by: Julie at November 27, 2006 12:20 PM

Reindeer. I'm lazy, I'll work hard 1 day a year. Now I feel inspired to start doing so.

Posted by: Derek at November 27, 2006 12:49 PM

It seems to me that flying, to a flying animal, must be equivalent to walking or running to a footed animal. Most of you don't choose to run. I'm not sure why you think flying would be any better. Also, I don't think reindeer are terribly bright, so I doubt they really enjoy the experience the way we would. I'm surprised people are choosing to lose their higher cognitive functions.

If elves enjoy making toys, then I'd say that's equivalent to whatever activity we do that we enjoy. It's not "work," per se, because they enjoy doing it.

And who's to say that an elf can't take a reindeer for a spin now and again?

Finally, the reindeer aren't living in their natural habitat any more than the elves are free to what they want. They're caged animals. Whee.

Posted by: Maggie at November 27, 2006 3:58 PM

Wow, that's a lot of thinkin'.

Where's my G&T?

Posted by: Patti M. at November 27, 2006 4:00 PM

LOL. Working at the North Pole is a fantasy of mine -- but seeing my sister's horses, and she takes very good care of her horses -- I just don't think it's much of a life. :-P

Posted by: Maggie at November 27, 2006 4:38 PM

These are magic reindeer, though. According to a documentary I saw on this subject (something about a reindeer with a red nose), Santa's reindeer can also speak. I don't know how great your higher cognitive functions would be, but you can obviously have a social life, play games, and travel around the world. Whether this is better than the life of, say, Anna Nicole Smith, I couldn't say. But I think I'd prefer that to being holed up in a workshop all the time. At least the reindeer get a change of scenery.

Posted by: Julie at November 27, 2006 5:06 PM

Ahhh... there's the problem... conflicting documentaries. In mine they're basically mindless sheep. Yours doesn't fit the problem, anyway, since yours had a disgruntled elf, and this is the prozac version.

I think in either case you're looking at a lobotomy.

Posted by: Maggie at November 27, 2006 7:34 PM

Sentience is overrated. Presumably as long as you're not being mistreated you'll be happy. Besides, reindeer games 364 days a year sort of implies fun. Hopefully you won't have some sort of disfigurement that will get you thrown out of the group.

I don't care how much you love your work, 365 days a year? I don't think you'll be loving it for long.

Posted by: B.O.B. (bob) at November 28, 2006 8:08 AM

Some would argue that the elves discussed here are not sentient, but rather are mindless drones. I think you'd have to be to work 365 days a year and "love" it. Sounds soulless to me.

Posted by: Patti M. at November 28, 2006 8:18 AM

Most of the fun of these "Would You Rather" posts is seeing how you guys choose to interpret the question and the choices.

Posted by: James at November 28, 2006 9:35 AM

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