April 3, 2007

Wow, You Smell Like God!

While some people feel that religion is constantly in their faces, a company has now launched an effort to get god up your nose.

“Virtue” - from the IBI fragrance company in Orange County — is designed to be a reminder of “God, Christ, spiritual self and soul.”

My take? I believe it is designed to be a money-maker for IBI, crassly exploiting religious belief to get a boost in sales rather than relying on how the product smells. With this product, God goes where other revered figures Elizabeth Taylor, Kramer, and that Old Spice Guy have already treaded.

This press release is chock full of BS, but I really enjoyed the reference to Mark 5:30:

For example, in the King James Version of the New Testament, virtue is recognized as both a power and a presence. When the lady touched Christ’s robe it says, “And Jesus, immediately knew in himself that virtue had gone out of Him, turned Him about in the press and said, who touched my clothes?” (Mark 5:30). Christ understood virtue’s power and presence - and knew when some of it left him.

In the New International Version it is described as “some power” leaving him. This passage always confused me as a child. The quote above leaves out Jesus telling the woman that her faith has healed her, not any power or virtue. So some virtue or power left him, but her faith is what healed her. Then what was the power for? Ok, whatever.

But the dedicated are supposed to figure out how scripture makes sense - not to criticise it. So, I suppose it could be interpreted as her faith allowing her to tap into the power that clung to Jesus like money to a megachurch. Wait. Now there is an interesting idea.

“The natural oils of Virtue® blend with the wearer’s own body chemistry to form your own signature fragrance.” — yeah, and so does garlic, curry, and pretty much anything you put on your body. If the producers of this fragrance had real skill, and some mystical chops, they would have produced a fragrance that was a little less pedestrian. They would have read Mark 5:30 a little more carefully and created a fragrance that was untapped only by your faith, and your actual virtue.

Wearers with Christ-like virtue who treat their fellow man with respect would exude an aroma that was supernaturally endearing. Wearers of low virtue who are so focused on the appearance that they have forsaken the substance would smell like mud, sewage and flop sweat.

People who sell their religion have always smelled bad to me. I wonder if they’d be able to wear their own product.

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Posted by James at April 3, 2007 8:22 AM
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I have a tagline suggestion (apologied to Kurt Cobain):

"Smells like the Holy Sprit."

Posted by: Patti M. at April 3, 2007 10:23 AM

I am dying here! Patti said it before I could - too funny!

Posted by: Cindy at April 3, 2007 10:27 AM

Maybe we should quit our jobs and go into marketing, Cindy!

Posted by: Patti M. at April 3, 2007 10:31 AM
"Smells like the Holy Sprit."
Which, considering that the Holy Spirit has been dead for some 2000 years, really says something, doesn't it? Posted by: Barry Leiba at April 3, 2007 10:41 AM

Patti, you kill!

Posted by: Julie at April 3, 2007 10:57 AM

You know, every time I read an article like this, I think that Im doing the wrong thing for a living, writing code 10 hours a day. I gotta come up with some skive like this, I really do!

Posted by: bob McCown at April 4, 2007 9:10 AM

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