December 4, 2008

That Video Must Die!

A friend and sometimes commenter on this blog, known to EAForums members as magenta321/Margaret sent me a couple of songs to use in "That Song Must Die." I thank her for the suggestion. They're both on YouTube, so I thought it would be perfect to do a "That Video Must Die."

Slight problem: I like both songs. Especially one of them. However, what sort of host would I be here if I was too prejudicial in my musical choices? I recognize inherent badness in these songs, AND certainly the videos are worthy of criticism. And it should be up to you, the people, to decide... WHICH VIDEO SHOULD DIE? It's the same as Thunderdome, folks. Two vids enter, one vid leaves.

First:
Romeo Void's "Never Say Never" (Watch the video)

Second:
Cycle Sluts from Hell's "I Wish You Were a Beer" (Watch the video)

No quarter is asked; no mercy should be given.

BONUS-BONUS-BONUS!

In case that was not enough fun, (and in case you can't see YouTube where you work) I've put together a playlist with the above songs. In true "wild card" fashion, I've added two additional songs to the playlist. Brandy's OWN "Never Say Never" and Tynisha Keli's "I Wish You Loved Me." Throwing these two songs into the same playlist as Romeo Void and Cycle Sluts feels like throwing a couple of sickly baby ducks into a mosh pit. But, what the hey? It's FOR SCIENCE!

Last night we were back at the Pour Farm and a fellow bar-goer exercised a friendly politeness and asked us whether there was any music we would object to. I told him to play whatever he'd like, and for some reason Derek requested "Journey" and we got into an argument when he criticized the "Journey" he got. I pointed out he didn't specify good Journey. Theres a philosophical lesson in there somewhere.

I had Double Bastard at the Pour Farm Tavern last night. That stuff is stronger than it tastes. (Worry not; to be responsible, I was planted on Purchase Street for a good five hours)

Derek bought me some kind of Banana Nut Beer. I don't remember the name. Pour Farm bartenders are happy to let you sample an on-tap beer before you take the plunge. And apparently there are beer tastings every Tuesday.

We wandered out too late to make it to No Problemo, so the stragglers found our way to Hibernia where we ate a late dinner, got our bearings and argued about statistical analysis and neural networks to a background of Get Smart on the DVD machine. The rearranging of condiments and plates into meaningful patterns got us some strange looks.

All this is a preamble to me saying: I don't wish you were a beer, but I do wish you'd be there next time I'm at Pour Farm.

Posted by James at December 4, 2008 9:08 AM
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Comments

As we left Hibernia, Sinead O'Connor was belting out "The Foggy Dew." I got a warm, fuzzy feeling.

Posted by: James at December 4, 2008 9:17 AM

I'm thinking that warm, fuzzy feeling had little to do with Sinead O'Connor and much more to do with the Double Bastard.

Posted by: B.O.B. (bob) at December 4, 2008 10:29 AM

I don't think I've ever heard "I wish you were a beer" before. They get points for using the subjunctive tense. I also enjoyed the lyrics. That sort of nastiness was less common in the eighties, and therefore funnier.

That Romeo Void video was horrendous. Has he been shot at the end? Was there supposed to be a story there? I think that was worse than the Tatooine Cantina rip-off video. I did like the song once.

I Might Like you Better must die for laziness and poor costuming.

Posted by: Maggie at December 4, 2008 11:32 AM

I never heard "I Wish You Were a Beer" before today. I don't hate it much, but it's not very good either. I like "Never Say Never" both as a song and as a video.

I wouldn't kill the beer song, but I think it could take a few punches. I'd rather kill "I've Never Been to Me" again instead.

The other songs can definitely die, especially "I Wish You Loved Me." I was going to recommend pouring honey on it and letting it be devoured by locusts, but maybe the honey would be redundant.

Posted by: Julie at December 4, 2008 11:32 AM

Woops, didn't say that right. I like "Never Say Never" as a song. And I liked that video better than the other video, but that's not to say that I liked it.

I guess I should have said I hated the Romeo Void video less. I hate "hair/outfits/dry ice" videos more.

Posted by: Julie at December 4, 2008 11:41 AM

Romeo Void

I couldn't seem to get a video out of the bit you posted, but I did watch the video here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icibDDQi4EU

I give the video points for being shot in black and white and focusing mainly on the band, with minimal "story." Many videos from this time period tried to have stories, and I always felt this was about as useful and well done as dialog in porn: This isn't why we're listening/watching--we want action from the main players.

As for the song, I always liked it, particularly the beat and the horns (horns are always good). Added to that is the disaffected attitude of the person in the song who says she doesn't think too much of the subject of the song, and throws at them the idea that casual sex with them might be an improvement. I like it.

Cycle Sluts from Hell

Again, I didn't see a video link, but I did watch it here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TJpr1MDgB1I

I've never heard this song, nor have I ever heard of the band. I looked them up and the Wikipedia entry says they were a heavy metal band in the early '90s. Let me just say that I have enjoyed a fair amount of heavy metal, and I still do when I catch it on XM or the radio, but it has to be the real stuff. This band ain't it. They're a female hair band.

At the half-way mark, I got the overwhelming feeling that I was watching a Kiss video. Not a compliment. Dull, uninteresting, repetitive video images. Uninspired and uninteresting lyrics.

I say Cycle Sluts from Hell's video is the one that should die.

Note: I could not bring myself to continue the suffering by partaking of the bonus.

Posted by: Patti M. at December 4, 2008 7:31 PM

Journey songs are a box of chocolates. Bite one, and you get killer riffs and hard-edged vocals (Stone in Love, Any Way You Want It); bite another and you get mellow tunes with just enough kick and emotion to make you say "Yeah, this rocks" (Lights, Don't Stop Believin'). Then you bite the one that gives you sappy, mushy, overly-sensitive goop that makes you want to beat Neil Schon (sp?) over the head with a tack hammer. You definitely need to be cautious when asking someone to give you a piece of Journey.

Posted by: Bull at December 5, 2008 11:52 AM

after those suggestions, Magenta must die! (only kidding).
The Never Say Never needs to die. I wish you were a beer was almost comically enjoyable - almost.

Posted by: Wormie at December 6, 2008 6:08 PM

Never Say Never is one of my favorite 80s songs. It reminds me of the Darryl Hannah movie, "Reckless". I have to vote for "I wish you were a beer". It's a bit too punk and screaming for my tastes.

Posted by: Kitten Herder at December 6, 2008 7:59 PM

Hahahaha! As a former member of CSFH, I thank you all for the entertainment. This is a great game. Google alerts rule!

Posted by: Raff at December 23, 2008 8:43 AM

Hey, awesome! Thanks for having a sense of humor.

Google Alerts truly do rule.

Posted by: James at December 23, 2008 8:52 AM

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